MOM IS SICK...

Hi Everyone - I'm Mom/Emma's oldest daughter. We know that Mom has so many great friends at church, in the neighborhood and among the many organizations she belongs to that will be interested in how she is doing. I can't possibly answer all the phone calls and explain the circumstances to all who are interested so we decided to create this blog about our Mom - Emma Allebes. Those of you who know Mom well, will appreciate the black and white checkerboard and bright yellow...think of Mom's Taxi Cab outfit. Chris (my oldest son) set this up for me - thanks!

Following is a copy of the email I sent to family and a few friends yesterday....I will add more info to this blog explaining how all this came to be and keeping everyone updated on Mom's current situation. Please send comments back to the blog that we can share with Mom. We'd love to have you share fun stories, special memories and good wishes.

Just a brief preview for those who didn't even know Mom was 'under the weather'...Mom had been feeling kind of 'punk' for about 3 weeks. However, it wasn't until the middle of last week that we started to get concerned. On Wed, Sept 23 - Mom had a series of blood tests done, and by Saturday, Sept 26 - we admitted Mom to the hospital at Kaiser Morse Ave.....it's been quite a rollercoaster ever since that time!

Here's a copy of the email I sent out yesterday - Sept 29:

I just wanted to send you a quick email about Mom. It's been an amazing day full of tears and laughter.

We've had lots of questions, answers and decisions to make - some of them have been hard but the final decision has brought all of us a lot of peace and comfort.

Mom has Acute Myeloid Leukemia. At this point, with Mom's age and the progress of Leukemia, treatment options are limited and only promise a very short term possibility of success - if any.

Mom has chosen to come home as soon as possible. She doesn't want to have any pain, she doesn't want to suffer, she wants to be home with her family and friends around. Although she is still very weak - she totally understood what the doctor was telling her. She was surprised at the diagnosis and her options - not what she expected at all...but she accepts it. Her words are: 'I've had a good life and a lot of fun. I know my family loves me and my family knows I love them.'

The doctor moved Mom to a private room in the Oncology Ward - E8 - where she will be more comfortable and very well cared for while we are making the arrangments to have her come home. I'm not sure how involved all that will be but I am optimistic that we can get her home before the weekend...if not, it would be at least Monday and we really don't want to her to have to wait that long.

Tomorrow we will be busy moving forward on that. Heather and I will be busy with whatever needs to be done, Reaka will go home to her family in Morgan Hill and we hope to allow Dad to have the day tomorrow to spend with Mom....they need some special time of their own. After we (the doctor and family) talked to Mom and she understood what was happening and let us know her feelings, Dad asked everyone to leave Mom's room (her roommate had been moved out by then also - yeah!) and they spent about a half hour just together. He needed that time alone with his Sweetheart.

Please be assured that our family is not taking this decision lightly. My previous plan personally had been to ask the doctor for copies of Mom's records, etc and to ask for a second opinion and to include alternative healing with our options. We had a family prayer with the doctor before our meeting this afternoon and are very grateful for the doctor's gentleness and frankness with us. All 5 of us (parents and 3 sisters) have come to this peaceful conclusion together. The RNs, CNAs and other support staff at the Camellia Bldg at Kaiser Morse have been so amazingly kind and supportive to us as a family and to Mom as their patient - we are so very grateful to them for that....they have been wonderful!

Once Mom was moved to the new room - she announced that she needed chocolate and sent Reaka on a quest. I came back from calling Brian (my husband) and Mom's sister to tell them the news and found chocolate being passed around and Mom giving more instructions. I totally agreed that a dose of chocolate was in order! Her demeanor has changed sooo much since knowing she will be coming home (and going 'home') - she's talking about all the people she's going to get to see with fondness - her parents, her sister, Dad's parents, Leslie Williams, a special Aunt - and she's making jokes. She's in better spirits than she's been in at least a week! We (Dad and my sisters and I) all feel total peace and comfort along with some sadness and tenderness about this decision. We know that the next couple/few weeks will be challenging and want to enjoy as much as possible the special times we will be allowed together with Mom as her friends and family.

It's been a long day and I need to get to bed to be rested for tomorrow. I had hoped to set up a blog tonight to contact and inform Mom's family and friends of her situation but that will have to wait for tomorrow or.....as soon as I can do it.

Feel free to share this info/email with anyone you think will be interested...I'll be sending out more info (about what has happened the last 4 weeks, what people can do to help, how people can arrange to see Mom, etc) hopefully tomorrow. If anyone wants to visit Mom in the next couple of days (Wed or Thur) - she will be at Kaiser Morse, Oncology Wing, E8. My cell phone minutes are pretty much used up - so I think I'll be using it only for communicating with my husband (free minutes) or emergencies.

Pam & Dorothy - you have both been so supportive that I wanted to be sure to keep you aware of what has happened. Thank you both so much for your help and support. I personally have felt so much comfort from having both of you encourage and guide me and give suggestions during this last week. What a Journey!

Hugs and Love -

Shenna Mealey